16 January, 2009

From the Archive: Ruckman Denies the Existence of Greece

PENSACOLA, FLORIDA - He is known as the often rancorous and forceful defender of the King James Version of the Bible. His books and writings regarding the subject of modern translations and other theological topics are controversial to many, inflammatory to some. He states emphatically and unapologetically that the King James Version of the Bible is itself perfect and inspired. He further opposes any efforts to examine either Hebrew or Greek texts in Biblical exegesis and attempt at a modern translation of the Scriptures. Over all Peter S. Ruckman of the Pensacola Bible Institute is no stranger to a rousing fight.

While most of his opponents are not surprised by his dogmatic statements and assertions, his latest statement has left many with their jaws hitting the floor.

"After much research and prayer it is my conclusion that there's no such place as Greece and, consequently, there is no such thing as the Greek language." Said Ruckman in his latest book The Conspiracy of the Evangelical Apostates. "Anyone who believes in Greece is part of the Alexandrian Cult seeking to undermine the authority of the Authorized Version of 1611."

Ruckman's book also includes his own "map" of the Mediterranean region which, as he states, gives "irrefutable proof that there's no such place as Greece."

But despite such "evidence" many are not persuaded that Ruckman is correct including Karolous Argyris of Greece.

"I'm not understanding this, is this supposed to be a joke?" Said Argyris. "I don't have time to even acknowledge such things."

Ruckman's assertion serves to support his position that since there is no Greece there can be no Greek language, and thus what we know as "Greek" was, as he states, invented by the "Alexandrian Cult" about 3,500 years ago with the express purpose to undermine the validity of the Authorized Version that would be translated some 3,000 years later in 1611.

"There is no doubt in my mind that this scheme was cooked up in antiquity by Satan to cause confusion and to deceive millions," Ruckman states "and for centuries he's achieved his goal. Now it's time to get back to the real original manuscript, The King James 1611."

4 comments:

James said...

Not that it matters, as we know that Paul wrote in 16th century King James English ANYWAYS. The Geneva bible was just a paraphrase of the AV1611, after all ;).

Heck, I bet that there's no such place as Alexandria EITHER. It's just part of a conspiracy by the gnostics into making us believe that there were multiple texts, when we ALL know that the KJB was the original eternal word.


OK, enough Ruckmania mocking. Gotta love those ruckmanites, though; those lovable, cuddly, conspiracy theorists they are =p.

TwistTim said...

It was the work of the grey aliens with clear blood or was that green aliens with blue blood? I can never keep it straight.... but Ruckman does believe in those... so they must have been the ones that propagated the Alexandrian cult and the presence of Greece on the map....

Peter Kirk said...

The Alexandrian Cult is alive and well, apparently, as shown in this illustrated post.

pilgrim said...

Hilarious!
I wouldn't put it past them...

At first I read it as a play on words of somebody denying grace, but then the name clicked--and I knew where it was headed.