16 May, 2007

Doctor Tries New Technique to "Raise the Dead"

BANGOR, MAINE

Some call him a "genius." Others say he is a "revolutionary," while even some will say he is "out of his mind." His name is Dr. Linus Fisher, and he has caused quite a storm in the medical community over the years with his proposed controversial method to bring the dead back to life.

The story actually begins about twenty years ago when Dr. Fisher stood by the bedside of one of his patients who was passing away. At that moment, as the patient was dying, an idea came to him that he began developing further. Two years later he released his theory in the Journal of American Medicine.

"It is, therefore, my conclusion that the ability to overcome death itself is rooted in the willpower of the deceased" wrote Fisher in his article. "The phrase 'lost the will to live' is so commonly used in a tongue-in-cheek fashion, yet there is a profound truth held therein. One's 'will to live' is exactly that, a will. I thereby propose that death may be overcome in one who has died by simple and practical convincing and persuasion by those around him."

Since the first appearance of his article Fisher has experimented with approximately 300 deceased subjects to see if he can persuade them to live.

"We've tried a number of techniques" said Fisher. "When I first began my work I tried simply standing over the deceased subject and shouting 'Live! Live! Open your eyes and be alive!' That yielded no results. Soon after that we began to involve family members, getting them to also offer persuasive words to bring their loved one back to life. That also yielded no results. So far the work has failed to yield one reanimation, but I still have confidence yet."

More recently Fisher has begun experimenting with a number of new techniques that he hopes will work effectively.

"In my most recent attempt I have tried standing on the other side of the room from the deceased while playing some soft and gentle music" said Fisher. "But now, rather than give the deceased imperative commands to live I plead with them gently asking them, 'Don't you want to live my friend? Don't you want the grief of your family to stop? Come, please, and choose to live today. It's all up to you. It's your decision.' This has not yet worked, but we are still fine tuning the process."

Despite failure after failure, Dr. Fisher is convinced that the ability of the dead to come back to life is a matter of one's will to do so, and despite criticism he still plans to continue with his work.

"Some say it takes a miracle to raise the dead, but I say it takes simple desire" said Fisher. "All a dead person has to do is get up and start living again."

15 comments:

Malachi_Abaddon said...

LOL!!!!!!!

DT said...

That was awesome! I also like how you used the tags to make your point clear.

Chris said...

I have a friend - let's call him 'Lazarus'.

He's been dead for 4 days, and is starting to stink. Can I try this new technique on him, or is there another method that has been demonstrated to work better in 'medical' history?

Mike said...

"Sooooftly and teeeenderly, Doctors are calling. Caaaaling you baaaaack from the deeeeead."

Lee Shelton said...

Chris, I think there's a chance that your friend just doesn't want to live. I mean, he's perfectly capable of choosing to live; he just refuses to for some reason. The important thing is that you gave him ample opportunity to make that decision one way or another.

Of course, anything can happen. But at this point, I would just go ahead and buy a can of Lysol.

B Nettles said...

He should try the magic words that Jesus used, "Lazarus, come forth!

Sewing said...

Ah, okay: I didn't quite get it, but Chris's leading question made it clear. Good!

Eric said...

Maybe the doctor could just "woo" the patient back to life. However, don't ever get in the way of his free will!

pilgrim said...

Hmm, it's a part two of sorts.
Another interesting and revealing analogy.

Next thing you'll be telling us we can draw water from a well by calling to it and convincing it to leap into the bucket.

Char said...

I was almost halfway through this before I got it. Very clever.

Pastor Bob said...

Wow... this one was clever. It took me about half way through to finally get it too. Very very well done!

Even ol' Lazarus needed Jesus to call Him out from being dead.

Joseph said...

Of course, regeneration precedes justification-- we must be "born again"-- but the analogy breaks down in that it is often the pleading of a pastor or friend that is the means by which sinners are brought to grace.

I'm sure many (if not all) of you agree.

This parable of sorts definitely tells the truth about the need for regeneration, but there is a time and a place for calling men to come to Christ and live. It isn't the pleading by itself that brings men to spiritual life, of course, but it can be used by God to do so.

Gary Brady said...

Joseph, I'm sure that any doctor who sees the slightest sign of life in a dying patient would shout and do what ever it takes to rouse him. The idea of waking the dead with words, however ...
Tom, have you done anything about the amazing "fact" that tho no true believer be plucked from God's hand he can wriggle out??

Tominthebox News Network said...

Joseph,

The analogy is not perfect, of course. I wasn't trying to negate the necessity to call men to repentance. The story highlights the total depravity of man, that we are "dead" in our sin not merely "sick" as the common Arminian practically believes.

-Tom

Joseph said...

Tom--

I completely agree. We are corpses in need of new life, not merely swooning sinners who can be persuaded with words. My only point was that, in a spiritual sense, people can come to life when someone is persuading them to. This is not because of the persuasiveness of the preacher, but because of the regenerating grace of God who can use us "jars of clay" to bring others the Treasure which is His Son.

In other words, there is no futility in calling dead sinners to new life. We should never forget that it is God who brings the life, but we should preach in and out of season.

I know you [Tom] don't dispute the need for evangelism. I just saw in your parable a flip side that we can indeed be in the position of attempting to persuade a dead sinner who can then come to spiritual life.